Discover more from The End of The Beginning
💡Something Old, Something New; Something Consistent, Something True
Soap opera obsessions, a new writing project, 60 days of Big Worth Energy, and a relaunch of my intuitive reading biz
So lately, I’ve been getting REALLY into daytime soap operas again.
Some of my earliest and fondest memories include watching soaps: Days of Our Lives at daycare (what’s up, Libby Larson and fam!), The Young & the Restless with my mom, and General Hospital with my Grandma Ardith. I couldn’t wait to attend Kindergarten, but I also let it be known to everyone that I had a very legitimate complaint about the fact that class clashed with my long-held Sesame Street-Y&R pre-lunch schedule.
And it’s not like I wasn’t learning anything from soaps: They taught me what drunk driving was and why it was wrong; what date rape was and why that was also wrong; how to spot the symptoms of Type 2 diabetes (unquenchable thirst, oversleeping and missing an important date, and scarfing down an entire chocolate cake meant for your b-friends bday party); and why jumping on stage and taking over for your rock star husband’s attractive singing partner when she suddenly gets laryngitis in the middle of a sold-out concert can save your marriage.
Also, the sex scenes were great.
I stopped watching soaps in high school, but picked up the habit again in college when GH kicked off the storyline around Lucky Spencer (played by Jonathon Jackson) and Elizabeth Webber.
I was OBSESSED with that intense bad boy with daddy issues who also had a heart of gold! The way he helped Lizzie recover from being raped?? How he would climb into her window at night and sleep on the floor by her bed just so she felt safe and protected??? And then their friendship began drifting into a tender and innocent romance, he made sure to go slow so that she could open up at her own pace???
I mean. My god.
Then in the early aughts, it was all about Jason Quartermaine/Morgan, played by Steven Burton (who I immediately recognized as the guy who played surfer boyfriend Chris Fuller in the Saturday morning sitcom, Out of This World…again, can’t do basic algebra, but I can remember someone’s face from a passing role they did more than 20 years ago!).
I mean…LOOK 👏🏻 AT👏🏻 HIM 👏🏻:
Look, the thing General Hospital does better than anyone is the brooding bad boy archetypical character who is actually an emotionally intelligent feminist who’s regularly conflicted with a desire to protect and defend the ones he loves at all costs. And Jason is no exception: All he has to do is stand on the docks of Port Charles and stare in stony silence at someone and you’re like, “I have absolutely no moral quandaries about taking the general of a mob boss for my lover; in fact it’s all I’ve ever dreamt of.”
So anyway. Since most of us have been working from home for months now with no real end in sight, I thought it could be fun to get back into “my stories” again (and then try to get everyone else into them, too). I started by sort of half-watching the Final Four (Y&R, Days, The Bold & the Beautiful, and GH) while working at my desk…and then before I knew it, I was looking forward to the 1:00 start time of General Hospital the way I look forward to my morning coffee.
I can’t say GH is as good as it was back at the start of the millennium, though - it was so much younger and sexier a couple of decades ago. So because I’ve never been one to deny myself a bout of nostalgia, I’ve been dipping into the vintage episodes on YouTube. It’s annoying to realize that episodes in 1998 are 23 years old already, but luckily for me, my youthful personality (read: relentless immaturity) helps off-set any “WHAAAT? But that was just yesterday!” shock and awe.
The ONLY thing that’s actually a little troubling about my recent foray back into soaps? I’m having so much fun reliving all the vintage Jason-Carly-Sonny love triangles on General Hospital that I’ve actually considered taking up some GH fan fiction.
I have no time for writing fan fiction! I have no time to even be watching soaps so as to inspire fan fiction!
But you know what, friends? I will MAKE time. Professional obligations will just have to take a backseat! I don’t make the rules!
…Speaking of nostalgia and the passage of time:
This week I launched a personal project that i’ve been steadily working on for almost a year…
…and it will probably turn out to be the scariest thing I ever do.
When my grandmother died this past summer, I realized just how little I actually knew about her life and who she was as a person. Going through photos of her as a young woman, I started thinking about how, instead of just a highlight reel or a place to sell our memberships and “high-vibe” courses, Instagram could be used to deftly document a person’s life story.
I don’t - and at this stage, maybe won’t ever - have children. As my Grandma once bluntly reminded me, I “don’t even have boyfriend…or a cat.” My stories are and may remain my only legacy…and there are so many of them that I haven’t even begun to tell.
This project also wraps into something I’ve been meaning to do for a few years now, which is to start telling the whole truth about my life. With the birth of @BigWorthEnergy and the work I’ve been doing with that project, I’ve learned that the only way I’m ever going to be able to truly move forward is if I bring the darkness to light. And the only real way I know how to do that is to do the same thing I did with my books: Take those sucktown stories and transform them into some kind of art.
Which does not mean this project is going to be super sad or depressing! On the contrary: It might take us a minute to get there, but soon you’ll be able to read all about what my 6th grade diary entries looked like (hint: EMBARRASSING): how I mastered three-way calling just so I could hear all about how my crushes did NOT like me; and the one time I skipped school in the 8th grade on a dare and was certain I would be arrested on my walk home from school.
Basically, if I were to turn it into an actual memoir, it would be entitled, “No One Here Even Likes You” by Amber L. Carter.
Also, if you’ve ever missed my blogging or narrative non-fiction, then this will definitely be the place to get more than just a fix.
I hit 60 days with Big Worth Energy
This felt HUGE to me - I honestly can’t remember the last time I stuck with anything for 60 days.
When I started this project, my biggest fear was that I wouldn’t be able to see it through. I worried that I’d become overwhelmed with the daily work it required; give up out of frustration due to slow progress; or I’d start to feel like I was putting too much of myself out there and then give into that old Aquarian instinct to hide away again.
Instead of wanting to give up, though, BWE has only energized me towards my goals even more. Thanks to all the work I've done with this project so far, I’m super excited for the progress that these next 60 days will bring.
Wanna be a part of it? You can subscribe below for the free Weekly Updates, OR subscribe to the Secret Sharing Circle, which gives you…
Members-only Daily Updates
Access to behind-the-scenes Close Friends IG Stories on @BigWorthEnergy
Access to the full archives on AmberLCarter.com
Making It Magic: A relaunching of sorts
On Friday, I sort of relaunched my intuitive reading biz, @MakingItMagic.
“Launch” is a very loose term: I still have so much work to do in order to bring everything up to code. I’m not 100% sold on the name, my website is a mess, I’m unsure about the branding, and the IG account has literally no content on it yet. I had a new, timely offering I wanted to share with my clients, though, so I didn’t want to waste another week (or month) trying to pretty things up before I gave them the chance to access it.
Look, there are other people you can follow who do everything perfectly! But you come to me when you wanna spice it up with someone who thinks way too much and then just jumps into things without looking! Alright?! THAT’S my brand!
New Offering: Quarter Readings
I love planning out my year and helping my clients plan out theirs with a 12 or 6 month reading to find out what the big themes will be. I’m definitely more of a prescriptive reader, but since these 12-month and 6-month readings have shown themselves to be incredibly accurate, I figured…why not go even deeper with Quarter Readings?
Quarter Readings focus on the current three-month quarter we’re living in, and will give you deep insight into what those months will look for you and how you can get the most out of them.
Right now, Q1 Readings are available until the end of January (and then they close until 2022); Q2 readings (April, May, and June) will kick off in March and close at the end of April, and so on for Q3 and Q4. For a limited time, you can schedule all four Quarter Readings in advance:
You can also sign up my Making It Magic newsletter to keep you abreast (heh) on fun teachings and new offerings:
What I’ve been loving lately (*besides* Jason Morgan on General Hospital):
UNHhhh with Trixie & Katya (on YouTube):
They’re bite-sized episodes where two hilarious drag queens from RuPaul’s Best Friends Race talk about everything from childhood toys to hooking up while on the road.
When you first start reading this, you might wonder if you’ve missed a prior book, but stick with it anyway, because you’ll catch up right quick and House of Earth & Blood is SO GOOD. It’s fantasy for adults (like…I maybe wouldn’t let your preteen read this one, kay?) that’s also funny, emotional, gritty, and packed with mystery and adventure.
Also it’s totally unfair that Sarah J. Mass is not only incredibly talented and prolific (she has two other HUGE fantasy series that you absolutely should check out) but she’s also super cool and likable. If you get a chance, check out her IG Lives or the podcasts episodes she’s guested - you’ll love her.
@medievallauren’s TikTok account
She does a ton of debunking on myths surrounding medieval times and culture, and it is SO fun and illuminating!
Skrewball Peanut Butter Whiskey:
It got me through the holidays.
And when I say “holidays”, I mean straight quarantining with my family from the week of Thanksgiving to the week after Christmas.
I don’t know what else you really need me to say.
Song of the Week:
Note: Some of the above are affiliate links, which helps me earn money to buy drugs. Thanks. Thanks a lot.
And that’s it for this week/month!
Maybe I’ll see you here at the same time, same place next week…and maybe I won’t!
I love the relationship that we’ve built here, where I can just show up whenever I want to and you don’t demand anything from me during the time in between…it’s like, now I know how it feels to be a single straight man in his twenties!